Fuck Boy (n.) : a male who lacks the ability to be about shit.
Fuck Boys have been around for about 250 million years, so they’ve already survived a few mass extinctions (The Flood, First 48). Here’s why I believe Fuck Boys could survive another 250 million years or so:
- they’re prolific breeders.
- they possess a parasitic seed that can eradicate a woman’s normal bodily functions for up to 9 months.
- they can lie with a straight face for over 45 minutes.
- their brain is dispersed throughout their body (head, penis, wallet, asshole) so even if they loose their heads they can live without it.
- they can survive in a variety of different habitats (work, home, school, church).
- they can evolve to suit different environments.
- they don’t require much.
- they don’t strive for much.
- if hungry they feed on insecurity.
- they are known to burrow in times of trouble (like laying up in their mother’s house).
- they assume that their word is law and if a women does not abide by it, she will not be “wifed”
- they are extremely sexist and try their hardest to drive their stronger counterpart, the Woman, into extinction or just simply replace them with the Naive Women that doesn’t know any better.